Dear friends in Christ,
What I want to reflect briefly on is the casualness of damnation, mainly, of others damning others as a casual thing. Growing up, my family was a little chaotic. We would get in yelling matches that involved phrases that included "I hate you", and "go to hell". It rolled off the tongue very easily by whoever said it. It seemed to continue, not only in high school, but also in college, where these phrases rolled off the tongue very easily. I wised up eventually not to say them, but I know many others continued to do so. When they were challenged, provoked, or corrected, one of these phrases usually followed.
Hate is usually considered the opposite of love. When we say "God is love", for example, we are equating God with love. Love is a transcendental. If hate is the opposite of love, then it is also the opposite of God. But pure hate is not possible; the reason is that it doesn't exist. When we say the word hate, it is the strongest word to non-love that we have. Hate then is the closest possible thing to the opposite of love. Now, you may be wondering, what about the devil? The devil, as evil as he is, is and will always be a fallen angel; originally he was created good, but because of his choice, he defied God, and became as evil as possible. The devil though was created with good in him, and there is still a minor speck of good in him, because it isn't possible for a being to be completely evil. The only way this was possible was if we said that the devil is as evil as God is good and loving. But that is dualism, and in a dualistic system, God and the devil would be equal: two cosmic forces duking it out for all eternity. In such a system, an innocent bystander to this cosmic brawl would be forced to appease both deities, since both are all powerful. But the truth is that because the devil is created (he was an angel), he can never be all powerful and opposite of God, but he is the most opposite a being can be. And as beautiful an angel of God is, that is how ugly and corrupt the devil is.
The devil hates us almost as much as God loves us. By saying "I hate you", we are quoting the devil, who says the same thing to every person in the world. The devil wants you damned. He doesn't want anything else but to control you for eternity. And when you say "I hate you", you are wishing, implicitly usually, that the person to whom you say it is cast into hell, and that you wish that person was dead and damned. In my opinion, saying "I hate you" is worse than calling someone a host of other things.
With the phrase, "go to Hell", do we know what we are saying when we say that? We are wishing upon the person we say it to an eternity away from the good God, and an eternity in the eternal flames of hell, punished forever. Scary stuff. So, why do we wish to say this to someone, except to express to them that you wish they were damned for eternity and that they suffer endlessly?
Now, you might be thinking, they are just phrases, and everybody uses them. They aren't just words. You say what you mean. If you say "I love you" to someone, is it just a phrase that everybody uses, or is there an important message in there? By saying "I love you", you convey to someone that you desire to love them as God loves them. We don't throw this phrase around, so why do we throw "Go to Hell" and "I hate you" around? We need to take custody of what we say, and realize that our words mean a lot more than we think. We need to think about what we say, and work better not to say certain things.
Try to separate yourself from these phrases, and others that convey to others that you wished you saw them dead and damned, and instead, pray for those people you feel tempted to say them to, that they, upon their death, may be lifted up to eternal glory and perpetual light.
If you have trouble with custody of words, try to pray to Mary, the Mother of God, someone who we can look to as an example of holy words, for she says to the Angel Gabriel, "Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord. Be it done unto me according to thy word". May it be done onto us according to the word of God, and may we reecho the words of Mary instead of the words of the devil.
May you remain close to the Sacred Heart of Jesus through the Immaculate Heart of Mary